Saturday, September 28, 2013

Venturing Out

After much consideration, I've finally decided to venture out -- down the path of blogging on my experiences as a solo polyamorous woman.

A bad (or at least less than ideal) end to a secondary (from my former partner's perspective) relationship serves as a catalyst in my decision to finally get this ball rolling.  I expect that I'll blog about it after I've collected all my thoughts and organized them more coherently.  It's still very fresh.

So, in refocusing on the lingering things I'd been meaning to do for myself, I finally got around to searching for the solo polyamory blog that Robyn Trask mentioned when I met her at the 27th Annual Loving More Polyamory Retreat.  Of course I'd forgotten the name/URL of the blog she mentioned, so I spun the wheel of Google and landed on solopoly.net.  (Hope I found the right one, Robyn!)  Considering that this was the first hit and all the other top hits were one-offs or only related posts/blogs, I'd say I probably found it.

Not even all the way through the first post, I found the kindred spirit and sense of community that I really needed.  I don't get to feel that every day, but it's absolutely fantastic when I do.  On those days, my world brightens and expands.

Before my solo poly world was expanded by solopoly.net, it was last expanded when I discovered that a long-time acquaintance of mine -- who has since become a treasured friend -- also tends to favor the solo polyamorous relationship style.  Though over the long haul she may be solo only by circumstance, it was absolutely wonderful to find an ally of such high similarity who was already someone I respected and liked.  On that day, my solo poly world got only a little larger by count (+1), but a lot larger in size (+100%)!

Upon reading the second most recent post on solypoly.net I discovered the Fetlife.com group, Living as a Single Secondary.  Considering my recent poorly-ending experience, I virtually ran to this group, kicking myself all the way there for not having explored FL more thoroughly since joining.

I'm still exploring these newfound outlets, and considering many of the concepts and experiences shared therein, but I expect that I'll find great support and information there.  With these and related resources that I haven't even stumbled upon yet, I'm sure I'll be able to better weather the ill effects of my recent experience, identify and learn from my mistakes, and be more successful in future relationships.

It's a brighter day.



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