Monday, September 30, 2013

About Picky Poly

The Blogger
As a blogger, and principal contributor to Solo Poly Life, Picky Poly is just starting out.  She's introspectively thoughtful and has a tendency to be quite revealing with it comes to her thoughts, feelings and personal experiences.  Her writing style can be wandering and difficult to read, given its interjections, tangents and frequent lack of clear point or purpose.  Despite the ultimate effect of her style, Picky Poly attempts to make her points as clear and succinct as possible.  The production of her pieces is slow and deliberate.  Because she takes care to write what she means, mean what she writes and likes to shake things up a bit here and there, she uses the dictionary and thesaurus at almost compulsively. She is new, but she'll write, learn and grow.  Have patience.

The Solo Poly Gal
As a solo polyamorous woman, Picky Poly isn't quite just starting out.  She first heard the word, polyamory, in 2011 from a much older friend of hers who could be described as an old hippie.  Given its Latin/Greek roots -- as well as the context in which the old hippie used it -- she immediately discerned its meaning, and was quite intrigued.  It seemed to fit somehow with her fairly recently formed views on how she wanted to live her life as it applies to romantic relationships.  With only a small amount of exploration she discovered that solo polyamory is the relationship style that seems to fit her best.  She identifies with it strongly and in some ways sees herself as having always been polyamorous, without really having a word for it.  In her poly adventures to date, she's experienced what it's like to juggle time, attention and affection between multiple partners, be a secondary partner to engaged/married men, and lose men to mono women who demand (or are expected to require) exclusivity.

The Perpetual Online/Offline Dater
Since 2011 Picky Poly (by the name Picky Poly recently, but historically by other handles) has  freely sought opportunities to date and form all sorts of different relationships with a wide variety of interesting men.  But as her handle implies, she is very picky -- and this isn't entirely by choice.  Her sense of attraction tends to be quite narrow.  Though she is sapiosexual to a degree, a fascinating and enthralling mind isn't usually the be all and end all for her.  She looks for the guys who've got a lot of different things going for them -- and these guys aren't usually the 10's that every other woman seems to be out to snag.  Although she loves it when other women flock to her sweethearts, the ones that the majority of other women find to be the cream of the crop often just don't do it for her.  As far as looks are concerned, her weaknesses seem to be green/blue/hazel eyes that aren't too piercingly bright, strong manly hands, adequate heads of clean-cut hair and clean-shaven or stubbly faces.  She's far more into the guys that present themselves as the clean-cut type than the ones that like to project a bad boy image.  Her (currently half-assed) profile can be found on OkCupid.

The Mask
When you get right down to the bottom of it, Picky Poly is really just the mask or alter ego of the woman presented here, who hasn't yet gathered the courage to come out publicly as poly.  This mask was created a couple of months ago as a result of the owner's desire to come out as poly in her dating life, but not yet come out as poly AND herself.  So, everything you see here is real, but the name has been changed to protect the identity of the cowardly.

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